Why Great Leaders Stop Telling and Start Asking

What separates good leaders from great ones?

It’s not a strategy.
It’s not intelligence.
It’s not even an experience.

It’s how they show up for their people.

In this episode of Lead to Grow, we sit down with Them Lam, Head of Sales & Distribution, at AFG to unpack the real drivers of leadership success.

From fleeing Vietnam as a child to leading large teams and influencing thousands of business owners, this conversation dives deep into mindset, growth, and what it actually takes to lead at scale.

We cover:

• The difference between individual success and team success
• Why humility, vulnerability, and curiosity are leadership superpowers
• The shift from telling to coaching
• How to build trust and unlock performance in your team
• Why slowing down is the fastest way to grow
• The role of gratitude and resilience in leadership
• What separates top-performing business owners from the rest
• How to create leaders who think for themselves

This is not a theory.

It’s real leadership, built through experience, mistakes, and growth.

If you’re leading a team or stepping into leadership, this episode will reshape how you think about success.

Chapters

00:00 Faster Answers vs Better Leadership
00:06 What Drives Real Success
00:12 Humility, Vulnerability & Growth
00:21 Curiosity as a Leadership Driver
00:26 Leadership Through Empowerment
02:07 Early Life & Foundations
02:16 From Vietnam to Australia
03:27 Lessons from Childhood
03:45 Work Ethic & Early Discipline
04:14 Gratitude & Opportunity
06:08 Reframing Stress as Growth
06:53 Transition to Leadership
07:49 Learning from Mistakes
08:03 Lightbulb Moments in Leadership
09:37 From Doing to Coaching
11:02 Slowing Down to Lead Better
13:02 The Power of Genuine Care
13:38 Practice Makes Progress
14:36 Why Taking Action Matters
15:02 Traits of High Performers
17:28 Growth Mindset in Business
18:17 Paying It Forward
18:49 Humility as a Superpower
19:41 Broker Investment Program
22:11 Scaling Support for Business Owners

About Lead to Grow

Lead to Grow explores the people’s principles behind high-performing businesses. Hosted by Tommy Sim, the podcast focuses on leadership, performance, culture and decision-making, with practical insights leaders can apply immediately.

New episodes are released regularly.

If this episode helped you rethink how you approach feedback, share it with a leader who may need it.

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